Finding My Way

It’s been quite the ride in the last couple of months. Sometimes being honest and looking yourself in the mirror can be the hardest thing to do but it’s worth it all at the end of the day.

I became a person I never wanted to become. I allowed all the emotions in my body rule. Became a person that I allowed angry, selfishness, pride, hate, and jealously rule my life. The person I never wanted to be.

I had to take real hard look in the mirror and I didn’t like what I seen. Who I truly was created to be was so buried underneath a pile of garbage and rocks that I had to really dig and pick up each piece. I had to find the gem way down underneath all the rumble.

What I found was a dirty gem that had scratches on it and needed a lot of work to make beautiful again. As I picked up each piece of garbage and rock I discovered was not pretty at all.

Selfishness, Pride, Hate, Jealousy

I bowed my head as tears stream down my face in complete despair. I hear these beautiful words from that still small voice.

I created you. I knew you before you were even born. I knew what path you would walk. I knew what you would be. I knew you and I love you just the way you are. You are beautiful to me. 

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So many times we don’t stop and realize that God Almighty knew before it even happen. HE is a Sovereign God. He gives us choices. That is what is so amazing about Him. I am far from perfect and I will never be. The way I thought, the way I spoke, the way I act and responded made this beautiful gem look ugly. I was touchy and irritable. I was outspoken. I  said things that I truly should had never said. I took things out of proportion. I was a MEAN person.

I may have never grown up in a home that taught God’s character but God brought people in my life that set a foundation. A solid foundation on His Word, His Ways,and  His Love. Foundation is the key if the house that is built can survive and flourish after the hurricanes of life.

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So my choice is to walk down a completely different road. A road that leads to balance, love, joy, peace, and contentment.

Even though I know tough days are ahead of me.

I have been blessed to have some amazing people in my life to sharpen and hold me accountable for my words and actions.

So Who am I……

I am a Jesus Girl who loves to pray for those around me and study God’s Word.  I love to laugh; yes I laugh loudly. I love to have fun. I am a wine drinker. I love chatting with my best girlfriend. I love being home with my children. Especially learning from them as much as they learn from me. I love my husband and being his wife. He challenges me to become a better wife to him and how I represent our family! I may be rough on the edges but don’t judge this book by it’s cover because really I am kid at heart and I truly never want to grow up. I love our home and re-arranging it all the time. HAHAHA. I hate laundry; who doesn’t. I hate doing dishes but thankful for dish washers. I love shopping online over shopping in a store. I love buying books. Yes books. Some women buy shoes or purses for me it’s BOOKS! I have over 300 in my kindle and I have tons more sitting on my bookshelves. Yes I love reading the books I have not just a collector. My kids have tons and tons of books. Wealth of information from all levels of life. I love Coconut Oil and Essential Oils especially learning how to implement them in our home. I have a passion for giving to others. I would rather give away than selling items. I love sponsoring our Compassion kids in Africa. It amazes us what our small contribution we give each month and birthday gifts; blessing them beyond words can describe. 

Prayer: Father God, may you soften each person that has read this blog today that they may desire to know you more. May you continue to chisel me that I may become less of me and more of you that every person that comes in contact with me sees your character shining through me. In Jesus Mighty Name. Amen

Hope and Pray that you have a Blessed Day!

Liz

Getting to the Root…Part 1

I am woken by my 5 year old, “mama come lay with me”

I graciously get up and walk back to my bed since I was laying with my three year old in his bed. Following a shadow with my eyes barely open and watch her slip in the middle next to her daddy. As a I lay there my heart sinks deeper in what had conspired from the day before. My heart was being spoken to in that soft and quiet voice. Not of condemnation or guilt but of love and grace.

Yesterday was week 1 and day 1 of another online bible study that I decided to participate with. Kinda hard not to participate when my best friend buys and has the book delivered to your doorstep. ha ha. Now that’s a true friend.  Keep It Shut by Karen Ehman, was a book I know I needed but I have tried so many times to watch my words and actions all I have ever did was fail. Yesterday was no different from any other day. All it took was a little fire of tiredness oh okay exhaustion, and that time of the month to cause me to spiral downward. Lets just say everything that could go wrong absolutely did.

Or did it.

Was it a day that God allow things to happen to get me to this place. The root of my explosions. Unfortunately, I always end up with an audience. The little people that God has watching me day in and day out. They really are the reasons why I want to be that better person and connecting mom. Not the overprotective, overbearing, co-dependent but the mom that is connected. I don’t want my kids to ever be afraid to come to me when they have done something they know they shouldn’t had done but did it any way. Or when they done something good. I don’t give them what they need most unconditional Love and never ending Grace!

I hope you follow me on this journey. I really don’t know where it’s gonna take me but I know that I am God’s masterpiece and He’s not done with me yet..

10 For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do. Ephesians 2:10 (NIV)

Elizabeth